Tuesday, November 25, 2008

O Give Thanks

"O give thanks unto the LORD for He is good, his love endures forever." 
Psalms 136:1

We put this verse on a thanksgiving card this year, as our hearts are overflowing with love and thankfulness to our Savior for out sweet little boy.  We are so happy and have much to be thankful for-we have a beautiful happy and healthy boy, a growing marriage, loving parents, a warm home...the list could go on and on.   Yet, being on this earth, we know that we are not promised an easy, happy or comfortable life.  We are not immune to pain and sadness.  I know my heart doesn’t always feel like giving thanks to the Lord. 

This time of year brings a mix of emotions.  Five years ago, on November 28, the day after Thanksgiving, we received news that would change our lives forever.  My dad called me home- David and I were registering for our upcoming wedding- and I knew something was wrong, very wrong. I called and called my sister on that drive home.  She didn’t answer and my stomach had a terrible, sick feeling.  My parents’ faces and words suffocated our hearts-Natalee died.  Words are hardly adequate to describe the intense emotion of that day and the days to follow. Our sweet Natalee, beautiful, joyful, carefree, in love with her Savior-gone? Utter disbelief and a stabbing pain of overwhelming sorrow flooded our beings. 

Oh-how does one get through such a time? How can the Lord be good and allow this? How can he be trusted? Our hearts scream, it isn’t right! She was only twenty, so young, healthy, active-with a heart full of love for others and for her Savior.  She wanted to marry Shane, be a missionary in Kenya, and raise six children. It isn’t supposed to be this way!   I must remind myself that no, this was not God’s original design.  And God agrees-it’s not supposed to be this way. world once was perfect- a paradise free from all evil.  But because of the fall, our once perfect earth became infiltrated with evil-famine, destruction, sickness, disease, hate, murder, genocide, death. All of which the Lord detests.  But…as Blaise’s Jesus Storybook Bible reminds us: 

God loved his children too much to let the story end there [Adam and Eve punished  and kicked out of the garden-a perfect paradise].  Even though he knew he would suffer, God had made a plan-a magnificent dream.  One day, he would get his children back. One day, he would make the world their perfect home again.  And one day, he would wipe away every tear from their eyes. 

Natalee’s death, and all other pain and evil, isn’t right and is not how it’s supposed to be.  It is a result of something gone terribly wrong.  But- there is hope admits the sorrow.  I know, with great joy and anticipation,  that I will see my sister again because of our love for the same Savoir who died and who promises restoration to this broken world.

And the King says, “Look! God and his children are together again. No more running away. Or hiding, No more crying or being lonely or afraid.  No more being sick or   dying. Because all those things are gone. Yes, they’re gone forever.  Everything sad has come untrue. And see-I have wiped away ever tear form every eye!” And then a deep, beautiful voice that sounded like thunder in the sky says, “Look! I am making everything new!”

And this, indeed, is reason for joyous Thanksgiving!  When we can’t give thanks because of our circumstances, we can look to the cross where God sent his only son to be our sacrifice for our sins and all evil, and then praise him for his goodness and the undeserved grace he generously gives us.

You see, no matter what, in spite of everything, God would love his children-with a never stopping, never giving up, unbreaking, always and forever love. And though they would forget him, and run from him, deep in their hearts, God’s children would miss him always and long for him-lost children yearning for their home.  Before they left the garden, God whispered a promise to Adam and Eve: “It will not always be so! I will come to rescue you! And when I do, I’m going to do battle against the snake.  I’ll get rid of the sin and the dark and the sadness you let in here. I’m coming back for you!”

Jesus loves me- a sinner who turns for him daily- that much!  What wonderful, undeserving grace he has lavished on us!

"O give thanks unto the LORD for He is good, his love endures forever."  

Quotations taken from The Jesus Storybook Bible. By Sally Llody-Jones. Zonderkids, 2007. 

Black&white pictures are taken by Synergy Photography. Kristen was friends with Natalee.

*I don't have many digital copies of Natalee pictures at my house otherwise I would post more of them! *

5 comments:

CJC said...

I love this post. You guys continue to be in my prayers. Natalee was such a fabulous woman and I can't wait to hug her in Heaven...
And that Jesus Storybook Bible is the BEST. We use it at our church for the preschool curriculum and I loved it so much that I bought one for our kids one day. :)
love you friend!
Happy Thanksgiving!

Anonymous said...

Thanks so much for sharing this, Amanda. It is amazing the way suffering and pain brings wisdom and perspective that God uses to encourage and teach His children. Thanks for writing about something so close to your heart so that God can use you for that very purpose. Your family and friends are blessed to have you in their lives, just as you were blessed by Natalee though your time with her was so painfully cut short.
Praying for you and family as you go through this difficult season of memories.

Lara said...

Oh Amanda! Your words are so beautiful. Thanks for sharing your heart with us. You guys have been on my heart all week and I want you to know I am praying for you. My heart hurts, but at the same time I feel joy knowing the Lord is good. Coming alongside you during the painful news of Natalee's death was so hard, but I want to thank you for allowing me to grieve with you. Spending that time with you was an honor and I felt like I really got to know Natalee! I love you!
I really enjoyed getting your Thanksgiving card/pictures in the mail. So cute! I hope to see you over Christmas and meet Blaise.

Megan Carson said...

Amanda---
I too remember this day 5 years ago...returning to OBB at Samford on Monday morning and Dr. Finn (I think) giving us this news. I remember being so devestated for you and praying, praying, praying. What an encouragement you have been, learning to "praise Him in the storm."

Also wanted to tell you how P-R-E-C-I-O-U-S your baby boy is! Keep having fun!

Love,
Megan (McNeill) Carson

Anonymous said...

amanda, i just read this...thank you so much for your beautiful words and pointing us all back to Jesus in the hardest times. i will be praying for you and your family during this season.